Post by Katlyn on Nov 12, 2012 20:53:22 GMT -5
(M'riel and Seleti. A follow up to the Rebellion, Accusation, and Punishment JP)
M'riel was sitting on one of the beds in the Infirmary, his arrow wound cleaned and bandaged for who-knew-how-many-times. He was still mulling over in his mind the events of the rescue op to bring Seleti home, only to discover Swift had once stood shoulder-to-shoulder with those Dragonkillers. M'riel had witnessed Seleti walk up to the young Bronzerider with uncanny calm, only to unleash her fury and land an expert fist on his jaw. Unfortunately, the Weyrleader was teeter-tottering between consciousness and unconsciousness, so he couldn't recall if Swift or Mac said anything about it. But just to be on the safe side, M'riel followed through on his silent promise to strike the incident of insubordination from Seleti's record...and sternly reminded M'cleod that Swift was to be brought into interrogation. The Weyrleader was already in a foul mood to learn of the prior association Swift once had with the Dragonkillers, and his mood only grew darker when Mac tried to defend the young Bronzerider. Yet M'riel held fast, invoking Rule 38 and expecting Mac to follow through with the interrogation...and a full report was to be on his desk in two days' time. That report had already been issued, and M'riel wasn't pleased one sharding bit by what he read. Swift was placed under heavy guard, Seminth was grounded by Josiath, additional recon and strike missions were now in the planning stages...
...but there was still one person he needed to have a heart-to-heart talk with. All of the official talks had been concluded, but this was slightly more personal in nature.
{{Oreath, have Seleti come see me when she has a moment.}}
The Bronze relayed the message to Cheyneth, but did so in a pleasant manner.
{{Cheyneth, Mine would like to see Yours when she has a free moment or two. He's in the Infirmary.}}
Seleti had pretty much kept to herself since they had gotten back to the weyr. Cheyenth was still recovering from the experience and had eaten more than her normal fair share. Her color, at least, had returned to normal, though her rider could tell that, even at home, the green was being watchful of her surroundings now. At least with Seminth grounded, the pair had had some much needed time to cuddle together, particularly against the cold that had enveloped the weyr while they had been gone.
Seleti hadn't been too pleased to learn that Swift had found himself under confinement following the rescue attempt, though she had by no means forgiven him for his secrets. They had gotten so close, and she had trusted him to share anything with her about him. His past, though, was something he had always kept to himself, and now she knew why. Part of her upset was due to the fact that she had been the one originally to bring him to old TriStar when she had arrived there. She was upset that she hadn't figured out the meaning of that tattoo earlier, or even since then. But the biggest reason she was upset was because, after all they had been through, he hadn't trusted her enough in the end to tell her the truth and know that she would know he was no longer that person. She knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that bronzerider Swift was no longer dragonkiller Swift.
And that fact was the reason why she was bothered by his confinement. Still, Seleti knew that her position with the weyrleader was shakey at best. Like the words she heard around the weyr, she knew it was her fault things had ended the way they had. If she had only just kept her temper in line, none of what had happened, would have ever happened. Instead, their weyrlead had been badly hurt and she and her green almost killed, and as far as she was concerned, that was an unforgivable sin.
The greenrider had been in the indoor course when Oreath passed on the message to her green, who passed it onto her. She gave a small sigh and went to wear she had put her coat down earlier, pulling it on for warmth and heading to the infirmary. It was time to face the music, she supposed. ((Mine is on the way,)) Cheyenth informed the older bronze before returning to her light doze as she curled against Seminth.
A few minutes later, Seleti was in the infirmary and headed to M'riel's bed. Once there, she said quietly, "You wanted to see me, sir?"
{{Thank you, Cheyneth,}} Oreath replied before passing on the message to his Rider. M'riel waited for the Greenrider to show, and once she came into the room, he simply shook his head at her. "No need to call me 'sir', Seleti," he said mildly. "I've come to understand that you're having a difficult time forgiving yourself for what happened out there. I'm aware you seem to think if you had just kept your temper in check, and hadn't stormed off like you did, there wouldn't be any reason for me to have my bandages changed again. I'm also aware you're not happy with my decision to keep Swift confined to quarters, placed under heavy guard."
He leaned in a little. "You're a talented Rider, Seleti. A shardin' good one at that. But I'll be the first to admit that I'm not the greatest counselor on Pern. I'll also admit I'm not the easiest person to get along with. Yet I'll be Betweened to have one of my Riders be captured and tortured on my watch by a group of individuals who would love to see all of Dragonkind eradicated. I don't care who holds one of my Riders against his or her will and threatens execution. I won't stand for it, and I'll do whatever it takes to bring my Rider home. I've taken an arrow for a greenhorn; a raw, untrained Guardsman who's just received his knots. I've now taken an arrow for one of the Riders under my command. It probably won't be the last time, but it's like I've told Shayna on many different occasions: Just because I wear the knots of the Weyrleader doesn't mean I can't be in the trenches with the troops, putting myself in harm's way."
M'riel leaned back. "But like any leader, I have to tackle the difficult decisions. You can pretty well imagine how disappointed I was in Swift when I found out of his prior association with the Dragonkillers. It hurt knowing that fact was hidden from me when I became Weyrleader, and that's when I started asking questions. I read the history of Igen, Seleti. I read of how the waters were poisoned, and Faranth knows what other tactics were used in every attempt to wipe out the Weyr. I needed answers. Answers that only Swift could provide, which was why I put Mac in charge of the interrogation. Mac has a long history with Swift, and my Weyrsecond was likely to get more answers than I could. I also don't take kindly to traitors, either. Yes, Swift made the decision to try and infiltrate his former Raiding clan to get you out. I don't fault him for that. What I fault him for is not coming to me directly in the first place, to voice his suspicions that it was his old clan that was holding you hostage."
"Imagine my surprise when Mac, D'verado, Dienon, R'bao, and myself came upon the patrol not too far from the camp. Four men, all wearing nearly identical clothing, all bearing the same empty bowl tattoo on their wrist. All identified as Dragonkillers. Imagine my surprise when Swift was spotted conversing with men from the same group. I had no idea why he was there in the first place. I didn't know if he had abandoned his knots and went back to his clan because he thought I was responsible for your desertion; or if he wanted to make it known he was dissatisfied with my leadership and wanted to resume his old dragonkilling ways. It wasn't until I saw him attack his own clan members, and that was when I had my answer."
He shook his head. "It's a good thing Shayna convinced me to put Mac as one of my Weyrseconds, and I put him in charge of the rescue operation. Otherwise, you and I wouldn't be having this conversation right now."
Seleti listened in silence as he spoke, knowing better than to interrupt him this time around. She still didn't really know why this man had irked her as easily as he had nearly a sevenday ago when this whole thing had started. She only knew that the way he came across when he first arrived at the weyr seemed very much like that of a bully to her. And while she still didn't agree with the way he approached things still, at least the way he had those first few sevendays he'd been there, she could tell he wasn't the kind of person she had initially judged him to be. If he had been, he would've had simply sent others out there to bring her back and not gone himself, or he wouldn't have tried to get her back to the Weyr at all. She could tell now that, no matter how blunt and brusque he might come across at times, he did care for those under his command. If only he were more approachable.
When he finally finished speaking, she replied with a quiet voice. "Swift being at the Weyr is my doing to begin with. Our paths crossed when I was heading to our old home TriStar - Ista Weyr for you, if it's repopulated in your time - to meet up with Des and Katlyn. We didn't necessarily hit it off on the right foot, but he eventually said he was headed to the Weyr, so to the Weyr we went. And then we both were Searched, and then we both Impressed. Whatever his intentions were when he first came to the Weyr, they changed the moment Seminth hatched. I'm sure they had changed before then. By then, the volcano that was our original home had erupted and we had been forced to Igen. He stayed and helped get people out of there, riders and non-riders alike. And I don't think he would have done that if he were bent on the destruction of the Weyr. No, I know he wouldn't have. He might have accepted the rescue to Igen, but it would have been very easy for him to leave in the chaos to go hunt down his old clan and say 'Hey, the riders are in chaos. Now's the time to strike.' It would have beent he perfect chance, but he didn't," she said. She had absolutely no doubts of her mate's loyalties and where they stood.
"He's been away from his clan for over four turns now, without any contact at all. Whatever information he might have had at one point that might have been useful, it won't be now. Now with a clan like that. They'll have assumed he was captured and killed, moved, changed how they did things, and not gone back, cause they'll have assumed he talked too. That's just how things are done with those kinds of clans. Mine, the one Des and I are from, they actually attempted rescues first. But his kind, the kind that make even us look bad...they just don't sharding care if they lose someone or not," she added then. All the raiders knew how to tell the bad from the 'good', and it was the bad that made it really hard for the good to be able to interact with holders on a normal level.
"I'm not mad at him because of who he was. I'm mad at him because he obviously didn't trust me enough to know me well enough to know I wouldn't care who he was. Who he was is not who is he now. He never has, and he never will, betray the Weyr, and I'd bet my life on that."
M'riel admitted that he wasn't the easiest person to get along with, and would be the first to say so. Yet it was often said that while actions spoke louder than words, the Weyrleader wasn't going to just sit there while one of his Riders was in trouble. The many Turns he spent in the Guards refused to let a fellow compatriot down, and his ascension to Sergeant Major meant he was responsible for every Guard under his command. That translated well into his role as Wingleader; now that he was the Weyrleader, it was no different. Every Rider was his responsibility. Including Seleti and Swift. Even though the latter had gone AWOL and not told anyone where he was going, M'riel was still responsible for Swift nonetheless. Right at this moment, however, the Weyrleader was furious with the brash young Bronzerider, and that was when Seleti began to explain things in more detail.
Apparently in this time, TriStar was what he knew as Ista. How or when the name changed he had no idea, but that didn't matter to him. According to Seleti, her path crossed with Swift's while en route to TriStar to meet with D'verado and Katlyn. Seleti and Swift didn't quite start off on the best of terms, but ultimately the two had became friends sometime before they had been Searched or after their Impressions to Cheyneth and Seminth respectively. Becoming a Weyrling often wrought great changes in a person - just about any Rider could vouch for that transformation - but Swift's mentality and personality changed tremendously; or so the story was told. The volcano at TriStar erupted, forcing the survivors to flee to Igen, and Swift stayed behind to help evacuate everyone to safety. Seleti did have a valid point - if Swift were still on his game, he would have gone back to his Raiding clan and gave the signal to strike.
The Greenrider went on to explain that Swift had been away from his former clan for the past four Turns. She thought that whatever information he had wouldn't be of any use, as his Raiding clan would have changed their modus operandi. Her clan, however, would have attempted to find him and rescue him had he been one of theirs. Furthermore, Seleti was upset because she felt Swift didn't trust her enough to know that she didn't care about his past; but would willingly stake her life on her mate's loyalty to Izuko.
M'riel rubbed his chin thoughtfully for a few moments, taking in what his fellow Rider had just told him. Finally, he spoke.
"While I have no doubt of your feelings for Swift, Seleti; the fact remains that Swift didn't tell me, or anyone else, where he was going. Had we still been in the Guards, I wouldn't have any choice but to mark him as a deserter, or at least write him up for being absent without leave. You don't just up and quit your post without telling someone. That's one reason why I benched him. And while his former clan may have changed their methods, the information your mate knows can still prove to be valuable. The more information we have on the Raiding clans that are opposed against us, the better M'cleod and I can plan our moves accordingly. But as of right now, Swift has a lot of work ahead of him to regain my trust. He knows that won't be an easy road ahead of him."
"I'm not going to make him swear fealty to me, as only Lord Holders would expect that from others. But what I will expect from him is his unquestioned loyalty to you, to his wingmates, to the entire Weyrleadership, and to the Weyr itself. Once he starts proving his worth, I'll take him off the bench and put him back in the air where he belongs. With the rest of us. As for you, Seleti, I know you weren't particularly happy with my decision to permanently reassign you to the Weyrwoman's wing. But I know Shayna well enough to know she won't lead you astray, and I know she's willing to hear you out whenever you have an issue that needs to be addressed. She makes a far better counselor than I could ever hope to be." M'riel shrugged, but immediately came to regret it as his shoulder complained, causing him to wince.
Seleti listened to him speak again for a few minutes before she spoke up again. "Sir, with all due respect, the only person here who deserted any post was me, and you struck all that stuff from my record. He only meant to be gone long enough to tell me to come home. A candlemark or two, no longer. I had been gone days by that point," she pointed out to him. "Course, once he got spotted by the raiders, he couldn't just up and leave without putting me in danger. It would have been too suspicious, and he was trying to find a way to get me out as soon as possible. I mean, the way those people think, this long lost clan member suddenly appears, stays long enough to see that they have a rider captive, and then completely disappears again? I'd've been killed on the spot and they would've started hunting him down as a traitor. And if they had left that island alive, it would've only been a matter of time before they got here. Then we'd have a really serious issue. As it is, whoever is still left of that clan will think twice before heading out this direction again. Because they'll have no way of knowing what happened, and like I said, that type doesn't go looking for the ones they lose. Sure, he didn't say where he was going from the get go, but if you thought you were only going to be gone long enough to go for a flight and then between right back afterward, would you have said exactly where you were going?"
No, Swift had never abandoned his position, had never betrayed the Weyr or the riders. Sure, he hadn't thought things through fully, but he had no way to know that when he left that morning to come make her come back home, they would be getting into the mess they were in. "Cheyenth couldn't hear the Weyr from that island. And it would have been a really big risk to send Seminth up to try and get close enough. We had no way of letting anyone know that what had just been a come and make me come home had turned into what it ended up being. He only did what he had to do to keep both of us safe, once he got mixed into the mess we were in. He had no duty, no training, so it's not like he left knowing he would be missing a watch..." She gave a small sigh. "When Cheyenth rose when we first found that island, Swift and I chose to stay there the night. The consequence was we had mids sweep watches for a month and weren't allowed to leave the immediate area for the same amount of time. In fact, the night you arrived as the last night of that for me. Considering everything going on, I would think that that would be sufficient for someone who was just trying to bring a fellow rider back home and ended up having to do what they could to keep them both alive when it was all said and done...If any one should be grounded, if anyone abandoned the Weyr, it was me, not him. I'm surprised all you ended up doing in the end was moving me to Shay's wing, considering I shot at you and then left even after you had told me I was to go to my weyr. It seems kind of lopsided to me, that the one who just happened to be raised by people who hate the weyr is the one getting struck with the more serious punishment when all he was trying to do was keep himself and his mate alive after stumbling into the mess I had gotten myself into."
"I struck the insubordination incident from your record, Seleti," M'riel quickly corrected her. "And I can't exactly put you down for desertion after that argument you and I had." He listened as Seleti presented more of her side of the story. Swift, she claimed, was only supposed to be gone for a candlemark or two even though she herself had been missing for days. The Weyrleader nodded as he knew exactly how long his Rider had been missing. But, once Swift had been found out, he couldn't just leave without putting his weyrmate at risk. Granted, it would have looked too suspicious and would have cost Seleti her life, and forced Swift to be on the run. Had he came back to Izuko, that advance party would have likely followed him far enough to figure out where he'd gone to, had probably found the location of the Weyr...
...and only Faranth knew just *how* many Raiders would have descended on their home.
Seleti brought up an interesting question, though. If you thought you were only going to be gone long enough for a flight, then come right back again, would you have said where you were going?
"That's why I expect everyone to look out for each other, even if you think you're only going to be gone a candlemark or two. Rule number three: Never be unreachable. Had Swift told me - or anyone in his wing - that he had his suspicions on where you were, that he was going to look for you; I'd have taken at least two others with me and go with him. Instead, he goes off by himself and doesn't say a single thing to anyone; I find he's gone missing, and I could only presume the worst has happened to him. Yes, it would have been a significant risk to bring Seminth close enough to get a message to Cheyneth, and Swift did what he could to keep you and him safe." M'riel sighed as he brought his thumb and forefinger to lightly pinch the bridge of his nose, closing his eyes as he did so. Faranth, why was this being so sharding difficult? Were some of the Riders under his leadership *always* going to be like this?
Seleti thought she was the one to have been grounded, and not Swift. It didn't make any sense to her why her weyrmate was subject to the more severe punishment in spite of his efforts to keep them alive after her being taken hostage by that band of dragonkillers. "Again, put yourself in my boots for a moment. You've just became the new Weyrleader, and you have little or no knowledge about roughly half of the Riders. All you know is based upon historical archives that the Weyr was comprised mostly of former Raiders from various clans, some of them at a constant state of war with each other. You get into a heated argument with one of your Riders, you get shot at, and before you're able to take any action she up and leaves, not telling you where she's going. All you know is you have an approximate heading, but that's about it. Now picture the rest of the Weyr who now suddenly think you're this uncaring person who doesn't give a rodent's rear about what you've done, but you know you have no other option but to admit to them - and to the Rider you've caused to run away - that you were wrong. It took me a few days to convince everyone here that I was wrong for what I did, Seleti, and I knew I had to come and find you to tell you that I was wrong. I also suspected something happened to you when you didn't come home, that it had been twenty-four candlemarks after you left and you never showed up. My gut was telling me you were in trouble, and I would do everything I could to bring you home. I didn't care who or what kept you against your will."
"Fast forward about a few days, and put yourself coming into the island where Serguth made contact with Cheyneth. You're making your way through the woods when you come upon some scouts, and they all have that empty bowl tattoo which one of your Riders identifies as the mark of a dragonkiller. You and your group take down the sentries, and you find the camp where your Rider is being held hostage - along with another Rider whom you now have to question where his loyalties lay. It was a judgement call I had to make, Seleti. I had no way of knowing why he was there until after the fact. But knowing he came from that dragonkilling clan, seeing him there conversing with his fellows while you were several feet away, bound and unable to move...it didn't exactly leave me with much of a choice. You sure in Between don't become a Dragonrider while still keeping ties with those whom are determined to destroy us."
"Now, you may disagree with my decision, and that's fine. I respect you for that. But I want you to know that I was wrong for driving you away like I did that day. I'll admit that I was wrong, and I'm not proud of it."
"And that, Weyrleader, is precisely why he didn't tell you. Because you're still new to the Weyr and couldn't possibly know how everyone's personality is, just as you just. Considering the reasons I took off in the first place, and the mood I had been in lately, he knew that it would be better to just come by himself, because he knew if he told anyone and they insisted on coming with, I'd probably just take off again. He had no way of knowing that that exact morning he decided to come and get me to come home, his clan had showed up on that island. And he also knew not to worry when I didn't come the exact next day because he knows that when i get worked up, it takes me more than just 24 candlemarks to cool back off again. The fact is, I had planned on coming home that morning those Raiders showed up. Maybe I should've left the evening before when I made that decision, but I chose to stay. And it's that choice to stay that cause everything to fall the way it had anyway."
She gave a small huff, realizing that he didn't seem to listen completely to what was being said. He felt bad about the argument, but the fact was, she was responsible for it too. And now she was trying to play damage control for her actions. "Sir, the fact of the matter is, you can't learn everything about us, and you won't learn everything about us, from reading records. Most of us Raider bred Riders...we've got tempers. It takes a few days for us to cool down from them and taking the wrong step while we're cooling down just flares us up again. But we're all completely capable of taking care of ourselves. We weren't raised with the easiest lifestyle after all. You've got a greenrider who originally Impressed to a gold rider, a blue who used to ride bronze. There's a twice dragonless woman here. Our senior queen was just killed when our two junior queens rose at the same time." She stopped briefly and took a breath before continuing.
"One rider has always, and will probably always, use a standin when their green rises. Another rider's blue is so much more suspectible to cold than most dragons that they should probably be moved south until this freak cold spout has passed. Almost every single female rider here is a mother, and most of them would miss drills before so much as even consider taking their child to the creche when he or she is unhappy. Not sick unhappy. You've got a goldrider who was partially blinded when her flit attacked her dragon as a hatchling, and that same rider continues to worry about how much she can truly benefit the Weyr when she can't so much as leave her office if her flit decides to leave and go get some food. There's K'dae who, bless his heart, is convinced that his runner Jaxath is his dragon Jaxath who's just been permanently grounded from a training accident. And then there's the rider who has a dragon who's actually been pretty much permanently grounded from a training accident. Then you've got each person's unique personality which can't be accounted for in records.
"The fact is, most of what I just told you, you can probably find somewhere, in some record. Most of our records are only a few turns old. Most were destoryed with our original home. But what you can't find from records is how each of those things affects each person mentally, and those around them. And you'll never find out how each person works, what their unique personality is, if you continue to think all of us who didn't come here with you know and can without question follow all of these silly rules of yours and stand aloof from the rest of us. Yes, you're the Weyrleader, and yes, you've proven yourself more than willing to go into harms way to get a wayward rider. People will see that. But they'll also see that you're keeping that wayward rider's mate locked up for an affliation that he had turns ago that no longer affects the person he is now, instead of merely saying 'don't leave the weyr without telling someone where you're going again' and letting him go about his daily life. Because ultimately, that rider being locked up throws off the balance of his wing, throws off his mate's inner balance because she doesn't know when they'll actually be able to start living together again, and that throws off her wing. When the only crime committed is leaving to go bring someone home and not saying that that's what they're doing, and they end up being heavily guarded for almost a sevenday afterward, and it's obvious that they don't have ties to the ones causing trouble in the first place anymore...." she stopped and shrugged then, knowing that she was about to start repeating herself.
"I'm just saying that before you assume you know everything based on what's in records, you actually start talking to us first. Ask us about us, ask us about eachother. Obviously there's a reason Swift didn't want anyone to know his past. He probably didn't want people to automatically assume he was still acting on behalf of his old clan, even though he's proven time and time to be solely loyal to the weyr. But if Mac continued to trust him after finding out about that, then you should too."
"Yes, I'm still new to the Weyr and I'm still learning about everyone," M'riel replied. He didn't like to admit it when he was wrong, but rule fifty-one seemed to be the order of the day at this very moment. "And I'm already aware most of my Riders have tempers and need some time to cool off. Shards, even *I* have a temper and know when I've gone too far."
He buried his face into his free hand while Seleti continued her impassioned defense. There was so little he knew about these Riders, and yet deep down he knew he had to somehow reach out to every single one under his leadership. Somehow, he had to show them that he wasn't necessarily aloof and "high-and-mighty", as he'd once been accused of being; but rather he simply didn't particularly care for formal functions such as feasts, Gathers, and the like. Yet his obligation as Weyrleader demanded that he do so, if nothing else but for mere formality.
Well, to Between with *that*. There was a time to be formal, but now was the time to be more personal. But while he continued to listen, M'riel realized how fouled up the Weyr was as a whole. A Greenrider originally Impressed as a Goldrider (how that happened, he had no idea); a Bluerider who once was a Bronzerider (again, he had no idea how that happened, or why); a twice-dragonless woman (Faranth only knew how said person could handle the traumatic stress of losing not just one dragon, but two); how two Junior Queens rose at the same time (did he even want to ask?)
One of his Riders always preferred using a stand-in whenever his or her Green rose (M'riel was willing to bet it was one of the female Riders, but didn't know which; but then again he wouldn't be surprised if it was a male Greenrider who opted for the stand-in); a Blue dragon was apt to suffer more from cold (he didn't know which one); almost every single female Rider would prefer to miss drills over taking their child to the creche (family was important to M'riel, as he'd once been a proud parent, so he really couldn't blame the mothers); one Goldrider was partially blind as a result of her flit attacking her dragon as a hatchling and worried about how she could benefit the Weyr (M'riel resolved to have Shayna discuss *that* particular issue with Ardalae); K'dae he had already pegged as someone whom couldn't seem to get over some mental issue regarding his runner as a permanently grounded dragon...
There was an oft-used term they used in the Guards for situations like this. And by the egg, was it *ever*. To put it mildly, it was a shardin' mess.
He finally lifted his face to look at Seleti. She thought that by keeping Swift benched and placed under guard, it was not only affecting him personally, but was also affecting his wing, and that of her own inner balance. She didn't think that just because Swift didn't say anything before leaving to go find her, it was right of M'riel to order him under house arrest in spite of the fact the younger Bronzerider no longer had any ties to his former clan. She also suggested to actually start talking to his Riders instead of merely presuming, and for him to trust Swift just because Mac did so. M'riel wasn't so sure about simply giving his trust to someone just like that, but to call his rules "silly" was a bit over the line in his opinion.
"I don't simply hand out trust, Seleti. And I'm sure you and the others are the same way. Trust is earned and not given. But never call my rules 'silly'. They're in place to cover just about any situation. Ask any of the Riders who came with me from High Reaches. They'll probably tell you that they don't always agree with my rules, but they're aware they're not hard and fast, either. They'll also probably tell you that yes, they do cover just about any situation to give you some idea of what to do, or what to expect. There's about fifty rules or so; it's my job to teach them, it's your job to learn them. Let's take Swift's decision to leave without saying anything to anybody as an example. You say it takes you a full day or longer just to cool off, and had I insisted on coming with him, you would have taken off again."
"The fact remains, Seleti, is I don't think *any* of us could have known those Raiders were on that island. I don't believe in coincidences, but what I *do* know is you went missing after you didn't return. I also know that Swift had an idea of where you had gone to, and all he had to do was to tell someone that he was going to try and find you. He could have also cautioned me about your temper and suggested that I not go with him, which would have led me to tell him that if he failed to come back within twenty-four candlemarks, I'd have organized a search-and-rescue mission to find both him *and* you. But not telling me anything about his past didn't exactly leave me with a whole lot of room to work with. That's why I insist that my Riders *always* let someone know where you're going and how long you anticipate on being gone. That's why there's rule number three. It not only keeps me from jumping to unnecessary conclusions, but it certainly helps keep the migraines at bay."
"And I do plan on getting to know all of you. Once my shoulder heals up a little, I have something in mind to help in that regard. But don't ask me to simply trust Swift just because you ask me to, or just because Mac does. He may have proven his loyalty to the Weyr in the past, but that was while Mac was still the Weyrleader. Swift has to be able to prove to me that I can take him off the bench and put him back into the field. That'll be my call." M'riel looked down at his sling for a moment, thinking. He knew Seleti was going to be disappointed, so he decided to sweeten things a little. "You two can start living together again as weyrmates. But the guards will remain posted outside of your quarters, and there'll be eyes on Seminth and Cheyneth both at all times."
He finally looked at her again. "And please, for the last time Seleti. Don't. Call. Me. Sir. Sometimes my Riders address me as 'boss', but M'riel will do in most cases. I prefer not to use rank unless a discussion has reached official levels."
Seleti could tell that what she was saying still wasn't making difference. At least, though, Swift would get moved back home where he belonged. It was a step in the right direction, though she still didn't believe that a guard was necessary. After all, with Seminth grounded, it wasn't like the bronzerider could exactly go anywhere.
With a sigh, she said, "You know...if you trust someone enough to make them your weyrsecond despite tradition saying someone else should be, then you ought to trust their judgement of someone else. Especially when that person was in charge before you for over five turns and knows every one else under your charge than you ever will for a long time to come. I'm not saying that Swift wasn't partially wrong for taking off like he did, but I was more so, and for the only he did being that, according to you, the punishment seems to far out-weigh the crime. I guarentee anyone you ask will say the same thing."
Sighing once more, she stood from where she had sat earlier and said, "Your apology's been accepted a long time ago. I only wish that I could apologize enough in return. Unless there's something else, I should probably get back to my weyr."
"Just by showing up so you and I have this talk is enough of an apology, but just remember: It's usually easier to ask for forgiveness. But otherwise, my decision on Swift stands for now." There wasn't any need for him to say that he and Shayna would have a private conversation of their own regarding Swift and Seleti; the Weyrwoman was likely to ask how long her weyrmate intended to keep the brash young Bronzerider benched. M'riel rarely set any timetables for keeping anyone on his "Bitran list", as he felt a person's actions and demeanor often determined just how long said individual would remain on his list. If Swift exceeded the Weyrleader's expectations, then it was likely the former Raider would soon find himself back in M'riel's good graces - and back in the air once more.
"As for Mac, he knows I'm not too happy with him for deliberately withholding information about Swift. He's also voiced his disagreement about my benching Swift. Yet Mac still remains my Weyrsecond because I do trust his sense of judgement of others. But that's not why I promoted him. It's his knowledge of Raiding tactics that I have to rely on while the Holders continue to oppose us. It's his experience with leading strike missions, hit-and-fade runs, infiltration, rescue operations, and other clandestine military actions was why I promoted him and named him our SpecOps Commander. I trusted his sense of judgement, his knowledge, and his leadership skills when we came looking for you. I have to continue to trust those same skills of his while we continue conducting these little raids of ours on the Traders' and merchants' caravans on the mainland, and I will. I'm sure he and I will have a chat at some point over some of Benden's finest whisky and talk about everyone who's served under him." M'riel looked at Seleti for a moment, then tried to shoo her away. "Scoot. I'll ask Dienon to have Swift moved back in with you once Eodira or Macira finishes re-dressing this arrow wound."
She turned to leave, at first deciding she wasn't going to say anymore. But she stopped and looked back at him and added, "Mac's had a lot going on too, you know. After all, that queen that was killed? That was his mate's queen. And I hear she's not doing all that great either. Especially with the twins being born early. Just something to keep in mind." And with that she left.
M'riel was sitting on one of the beds in the Infirmary, his arrow wound cleaned and bandaged for who-knew-how-many-times. He was still mulling over in his mind the events of the rescue op to bring Seleti home, only to discover Swift had once stood shoulder-to-shoulder with those Dragonkillers. M'riel had witnessed Seleti walk up to the young Bronzerider with uncanny calm, only to unleash her fury and land an expert fist on his jaw. Unfortunately, the Weyrleader was teeter-tottering between consciousness and unconsciousness, so he couldn't recall if Swift or Mac said anything about it. But just to be on the safe side, M'riel followed through on his silent promise to strike the incident of insubordination from Seleti's record...and sternly reminded M'cleod that Swift was to be brought into interrogation. The Weyrleader was already in a foul mood to learn of the prior association Swift once had with the Dragonkillers, and his mood only grew darker when Mac tried to defend the young Bronzerider. Yet M'riel held fast, invoking Rule 38 and expecting Mac to follow through with the interrogation...and a full report was to be on his desk in two days' time. That report had already been issued, and M'riel wasn't pleased one sharding bit by what he read. Swift was placed under heavy guard, Seminth was grounded by Josiath, additional recon and strike missions were now in the planning stages...
...but there was still one person he needed to have a heart-to-heart talk with. All of the official talks had been concluded, but this was slightly more personal in nature.
{{Oreath, have Seleti come see me when she has a moment.}}
The Bronze relayed the message to Cheyneth, but did so in a pleasant manner.
{{Cheyneth, Mine would like to see Yours when she has a free moment or two. He's in the Infirmary.}}
Seleti had pretty much kept to herself since they had gotten back to the weyr. Cheyenth was still recovering from the experience and had eaten more than her normal fair share. Her color, at least, had returned to normal, though her rider could tell that, even at home, the green was being watchful of her surroundings now. At least with Seminth grounded, the pair had had some much needed time to cuddle together, particularly against the cold that had enveloped the weyr while they had been gone.
Seleti hadn't been too pleased to learn that Swift had found himself under confinement following the rescue attempt, though she had by no means forgiven him for his secrets. They had gotten so close, and she had trusted him to share anything with her about him. His past, though, was something he had always kept to himself, and now she knew why. Part of her upset was due to the fact that she had been the one originally to bring him to old TriStar when she had arrived there. She was upset that she hadn't figured out the meaning of that tattoo earlier, or even since then. But the biggest reason she was upset was because, after all they had been through, he hadn't trusted her enough in the end to tell her the truth and know that she would know he was no longer that person. She knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that bronzerider Swift was no longer dragonkiller Swift.
And that fact was the reason why she was bothered by his confinement. Still, Seleti knew that her position with the weyrleader was shakey at best. Like the words she heard around the weyr, she knew it was her fault things had ended the way they had. If she had only just kept her temper in line, none of what had happened, would have ever happened. Instead, their weyrlead had been badly hurt and she and her green almost killed, and as far as she was concerned, that was an unforgivable sin.
The greenrider had been in the indoor course when Oreath passed on the message to her green, who passed it onto her. She gave a small sigh and went to wear she had put her coat down earlier, pulling it on for warmth and heading to the infirmary. It was time to face the music, she supposed. ((Mine is on the way,)) Cheyenth informed the older bronze before returning to her light doze as she curled against Seminth.
A few minutes later, Seleti was in the infirmary and headed to M'riel's bed. Once there, she said quietly, "You wanted to see me, sir?"
{{Thank you, Cheyneth,}} Oreath replied before passing on the message to his Rider. M'riel waited for the Greenrider to show, and once she came into the room, he simply shook his head at her. "No need to call me 'sir', Seleti," he said mildly. "I've come to understand that you're having a difficult time forgiving yourself for what happened out there. I'm aware you seem to think if you had just kept your temper in check, and hadn't stormed off like you did, there wouldn't be any reason for me to have my bandages changed again. I'm also aware you're not happy with my decision to keep Swift confined to quarters, placed under heavy guard."
He leaned in a little. "You're a talented Rider, Seleti. A shardin' good one at that. But I'll be the first to admit that I'm not the greatest counselor on Pern. I'll also admit I'm not the easiest person to get along with. Yet I'll be Betweened to have one of my Riders be captured and tortured on my watch by a group of individuals who would love to see all of Dragonkind eradicated. I don't care who holds one of my Riders against his or her will and threatens execution. I won't stand for it, and I'll do whatever it takes to bring my Rider home. I've taken an arrow for a greenhorn; a raw, untrained Guardsman who's just received his knots. I've now taken an arrow for one of the Riders under my command. It probably won't be the last time, but it's like I've told Shayna on many different occasions: Just because I wear the knots of the Weyrleader doesn't mean I can't be in the trenches with the troops, putting myself in harm's way."
M'riel leaned back. "But like any leader, I have to tackle the difficult decisions. You can pretty well imagine how disappointed I was in Swift when I found out of his prior association with the Dragonkillers. It hurt knowing that fact was hidden from me when I became Weyrleader, and that's when I started asking questions. I read the history of Igen, Seleti. I read of how the waters were poisoned, and Faranth knows what other tactics were used in every attempt to wipe out the Weyr. I needed answers. Answers that only Swift could provide, which was why I put Mac in charge of the interrogation. Mac has a long history with Swift, and my Weyrsecond was likely to get more answers than I could. I also don't take kindly to traitors, either. Yes, Swift made the decision to try and infiltrate his former Raiding clan to get you out. I don't fault him for that. What I fault him for is not coming to me directly in the first place, to voice his suspicions that it was his old clan that was holding you hostage."
"Imagine my surprise when Mac, D'verado, Dienon, R'bao, and myself came upon the patrol not too far from the camp. Four men, all wearing nearly identical clothing, all bearing the same empty bowl tattoo on their wrist. All identified as Dragonkillers. Imagine my surprise when Swift was spotted conversing with men from the same group. I had no idea why he was there in the first place. I didn't know if he had abandoned his knots and went back to his clan because he thought I was responsible for your desertion; or if he wanted to make it known he was dissatisfied with my leadership and wanted to resume his old dragonkilling ways. It wasn't until I saw him attack his own clan members, and that was when I had my answer."
He shook his head. "It's a good thing Shayna convinced me to put Mac as one of my Weyrseconds, and I put him in charge of the rescue operation. Otherwise, you and I wouldn't be having this conversation right now."
Seleti listened in silence as he spoke, knowing better than to interrupt him this time around. She still didn't really know why this man had irked her as easily as he had nearly a sevenday ago when this whole thing had started. She only knew that the way he came across when he first arrived at the weyr seemed very much like that of a bully to her. And while she still didn't agree with the way he approached things still, at least the way he had those first few sevendays he'd been there, she could tell he wasn't the kind of person she had initially judged him to be. If he had been, he would've had simply sent others out there to bring her back and not gone himself, or he wouldn't have tried to get her back to the Weyr at all. She could tell now that, no matter how blunt and brusque he might come across at times, he did care for those under his command. If only he were more approachable.
When he finally finished speaking, she replied with a quiet voice. "Swift being at the Weyr is my doing to begin with. Our paths crossed when I was heading to our old home TriStar - Ista Weyr for you, if it's repopulated in your time - to meet up with Des and Katlyn. We didn't necessarily hit it off on the right foot, but he eventually said he was headed to the Weyr, so to the Weyr we went. And then we both were Searched, and then we both Impressed. Whatever his intentions were when he first came to the Weyr, they changed the moment Seminth hatched. I'm sure they had changed before then. By then, the volcano that was our original home had erupted and we had been forced to Igen. He stayed and helped get people out of there, riders and non-riders alike. And I don't think he would have done that if he were bent on the destruction of the Weyr. No, I know he wouldn't have. He might have accepted the rescue to Igen, but it would have been very easy for him to leave in the chaos to go hunt down his old clan and say 'Hey, the riders are in chaos. Now's the time to strike.' It would have beent he perfect chance, but he didn't," she said. She had absolutely no doubts of her mate's loyalties and where they stood.
"He's been away from his clan for over four turns now, without any contact at all. Whatever information he might have had at one point that might have been useful, it won't be now. Now with a clan like that. They'll have assumed he was captured and killed, moved, changed how they did things, and not gone back, cause they'll have assumed he talked too. That's just how things are done with those kinds of clans. Mine, the one Des and I are from, they actually attempted rescues first. But his kind, the kind that make even us look bad...they just don't sharding care if they lose someone or not," she added then. All the raiders knew how to tell the bad from the 'good', and it was the bad that made it really hard for the good to be able to interact with holders on a normal level.
"I'm not mad at him because of who he was. I'm mad at him because he obviously didn't trust me enough to know me well enough to know I wouldn't care who he was. Who he was is not who is he now. He never has, and he never will, betray the Weyr, and I'd bet my life on that."
M'riel admitted that he wasn't the easiest person to get along with, and would be the first to say so. Yet it was often said that while actions spoke louder than words, the Weyrleader wasn't going to just sit there while one of his Riders was in trouble. The many Turns he spent in the Guards refused to let a fellow compatriot down, and his ascension to Sergeant Major meant he was responsible for every Guard under his command. That translated well into his role as Wingleader; now that he was the Weyrleader, it was no different. Every Rider was his responsibility. Including Seleti and Swift. Even though the latter had gone AWOL and not told anyone where he was going, M'riel was still responsible for Swift nonetheless. Right at this moment, however, the Weyrleader was furious with the brash young Bronzerider, and that was when Seleti began to explain things in more detail.
Apparently in this time, TriStar was what he knew as Ista. How or when the name changed he had no idea, but that didn't matter to him. According to Seleti, her path crossed with Swift's while en route to TriStar to meet with D'verado and Katlyn. Seleti and Swift didn't quite start off on the best of terms, but ultimately the two had became friends sometime before they had been Searched or after their Impressions to Cheyneth and Seminth respectively. Becoming a Weyrling often wrought great changes in a person - just about any Rider could vouch for that transformation - but Swift's mentality and personality changed tremendously; or so the story was told. The volcano at TriStar erupted, forcing the survivors to flee to Igen, and Swift stayed behind to help evacuate everyone to safety. Seleti did have a valid point - if Swift were still on his game, he would have gone back to his Raiding clan and gave the signal to strike.
The Greenrider went on to explain that Swift had been away from his former clan for the past four Turns. She thought that whatever information he had wouldn't be of any use, as his Raiding clan would have changed their modus operandi. Her clan, however, would have attempted to find him and rescue him had he been one of theirs. Furthermore, Seleti was upset because she felt Swift didn't trust her enough to know that she didn't care about his past; but would willingly stake her life on her mate's loyalty to Izuko.
M'riel rubbed his chin thoughtfully for a few moments, taking in what his fellow Rider had just told him. Finally, he spoke.
"While I have no doubt of your feelings for Swift, Seleti; the fact remains that Swift didn't tell me, or anyone else, where he was going. Had we still been in the Guards, I wouldn't have any choice but to mark him as a deserter, or at least write him up for being absent without leave. You don't just up and quit your post without telling someone. That's one reason why I benched him. And while his former clan may have changed their methods, the information your mate knows can still prove to be valuable. The more information we have on the Raiding clans that are opposed against us, the better M'cleod and I can plan our moves accordingly. But as of right now, Swift has a lot of work ahead of him to regain my trust. He knows that won't be an easy road ahead of him."
"I'm not going to make him swear fealty to me, as only Lord Holders would expect that from others. But what I will expect from him is his unquestioned loyalty to you, to his wingmates, to the entire Weyrleadership, and to the Weyr itself. Once he starts proving his worth, I'll take him off the bench and put him back in the air where he belongs. With the rest of us. As for you, Seleti, I know you weren't particularly happy with my decision to permanently reassign you to the Weyrwoman's wing. But I know Shayna well enough to know she won't lead you astray, and I know she's willing to hear you out whenever you have an issue that needs to be addressed. She makes a far better counselor than I could ever hope to be." M'riel shrugged, but immediately came to regret it as his shoulder complained, causing him to wince.
Seleti listened to him speak again for a few minutes before she spoke up again. "Sir, with all due respect, the only person here who deserted any post was me, and you struck all that stuff from my record. He only meant to be gone long enough to tell me to come home. A candlemark or two, no longer. I had been gone days by that point," she pointed out to him. "Course, once he got spotted by the raiders, he couldn't just up and leave without putting me in danger. It would have been too suspicious, and he was trying to find a way to get me out as soon as possible. I mean, the way those people think, this long lost clan member suddenly appears, stays long enough to see that they have a rider captive, and then completely disappears again? I'd've been killed on the spot and they would've started hunting him down as a traitor. And if they had left that island alive, it would've only been a matter of time before they got here. Then we'd have a really serious issue. As it is, whoever is still left of that clan will think twice before heading out this direction again. Because they'll have no way of knowing what happened, and like I said, that type doesn't go looking for the ones they lose. Sure, he didn't say where he was going from the get go, but if you thought you were only going to be gone long enough to go for a flight and then between right back afterward, would you have said exactly where you were going?"
No, Swift had never abandoned his position, had never betrayed the Weyr or the riders. Sure, he hadn't thought things through fully, but he had no way to know that when he left that morning to come make her come back home, they would be getting into the mess they were in. "Cheyenth couldn't hear the Weyr from that island. And it would have been a really big risk to send Seminth up to try and get close enough. We had no way of letting anyone know that what had just been a come and make me come home had turned into what it ended up being. He only did what he had to do to keep both of us safe, once he got mixed into the mess we were in. He had no duty, no training, so it's not like he left knowing he would be missing a watch..." She gave a small sigh. "When Cheyenth rose when we first found that island, Swift and I chose to stay there the night. The consequence was we had mids sweep watches for a month and weren't allowed to leave the immediate area for the same amount of time. In fact, the night you arrived as the last night of that for me. Considering everything going on, I would think that that would be sufficient for someone who was just trying to bring a fellow rider back home and ended up having to do what they could to keep them both alive when it was all said and done...If any one should be grounded, if anyone abandoned the Weyr, it was me, not him. I'm surprised all you ended up doing in the end was moving me to Shay's wing, considering I shot at you and then left even after you had told me I was to go to my weyr. It seems kind of lopsided to me, that the one who just happened to be raised by people who hate the weyr is the one getting struck with the more serious punishment when all he was trying to do was keep himself and his mate alive after stumbling into the mess I had gotten myself into."
"I struck the insubordination incident from your record, Seleti," M'riel quickly corrected her. "And I can't exactly put you down for desertion after that argument you and I had." He listened as Seleti presented more of her side of the story. Swift, she claimed, was only supposed to be gone for a candlemark or two even though she herself had been missing for days. The Weyrleader nodded as he knew exactly how long his Rider had been missing. But, once Swift had been found out, he couldn't just leave without putting his weyrmate at risk. Granted, it would have looked too suspicious and would have cost Seleti her life, and forced Swift to be on the run. Had he came back to Izuko, that advance party would have likely followed him far enough to figure out where he'd gone to, had probably found the location of the Weyr...
...and only Faranth knew just *how* many Raiders would have descended on their home.
Seleti brought up an interesting question, though. If you thought you were only going to be gone long enough for a flight, then come right back again, would you have said where you were going?
"That's why I expect everyone to look out for each other, even if you think you're only going to be gone a candlemark or two. Rule number three: Never be unreachable. Had Swift told me - or anyone in his wing - that he had his suspicions on where you were, that he was going to look for you; I'd have taken at least two others with me and go with him. Instead, he goes off by himself and doesn't say a single thing to anyone; I find he's gone missing, and I could only presume the worst has happened to him. Yes, it would have been a significant risk to bring Seminth close enough to get a message to Cheyneth, and Swift did what he could to keep you and him safe." M'riel sighed as he brought his thumb and forefinger to lightly pinch the bridge of his nose, closing his eyes as he did so. Faranth, why was this being so sharding difficult? Were some of the Riders under his leadership *always* going to be like this?
Seleti thought she was the one to have been grounded, and not Swift. It didn't make any sense to her why her weyrmate was subject to the more severe punishment in spite of his efforts to keep them alive after her being taken hostage by that band of dragonkillers. "Again, put yourself in my boots for a moment. You've just became the new Weyrleader, and you have little or no knowledge about roughly half of the Riders. All you know is based upon historical archives that the Weyr was comprised mostly of former Raiders from various clans, some of them at a constant state of war with each other. You get into a heated argument with one of your Riders, you get shot at, and before you're able to take any action she up and leaves, not telling you where she's going. All you know is you have an approximate heading, but that's about it. Now picture the rest of the Weyr who now suddenly think you're this uncaring person who doesn't give a rodent's rear about what you've done, but you know you have no other option but to admit to them - and to the Rider you've caused to run away - that you were wrong. It took me a few days to convince everyone here that I was wrong for what I did, Seleti, and I knew I had to come and find you to tell you that I was wrong. I also suspected something happened to you when you didn't come home, that it had been twenty-four candlemarks after you left and you never showed up. My gut was telling me you were in trouble, and I would do everything I could to bring you home. I didn't care who or what kept you against your will."
"Fast forward about a few days, and put yourself coming into the island where Serguth made contact with Cheyneth. You're making your way through the woods when you come upon some scouts, and they all have that empty bowl tattoo which one of your Riders identifies as the mark of a dragonkiller. You and your group take down the sentries, and you find the camp where your Rider is being held hostage - along with another Rider whom you now have to question where his loyalties lay. It was a judgement call I had to make, Seleti. I had no way of knowing why he was there until after the fact. But knowing he came from that dragonkilling clan, seeing him there conversing with his fellows while you were several feet away, bound and unable to move...it didn't exactly leave me with much of a choice. You sure in Between don't become a Dragonrider while still keeping ties with those whom are determined to destroy us."
"Now, you may disagree with my decision, and that's fine. I respect you for that. But I want you to know that I was wrong for driving you away like I did that day. I'll admit that I was wrong, and I'm not proud of it."
"And that, Weyrleader, is precisely why he didn't tell you. Because you're still new to the Weyr and couldn't possibly know how everyone's personality is, just as you just. Considering the reasons I took off in the first place, and the mood I had been in lately, he knew that it would be better to just come by himself, because he knew if he told anyone and they insisted on coming with, I'd probably just take off again. He had no way of knowing that that exact morning he decided to come and get me to come home, his clan had showed up on that island. And he also knew not to worry when I didn't come the exact next day because he knows that when i get worked up, it takes me more than just 24 candlemarks to cool back off again. The fact is, I had planned on coming home that morning those Raiders showed up. Maybe I should've left the evening before when I made that decision, but I chose to stay. And it's that choice to stay that cause everything to fall the way it had anyway."
She gave a small huff, realizing that he didn't seem to listen completely to what was being said. He felt bad about the argument, but the fact was, she was responsible for it too. And now she was trying to play damage control for her actions. "Sir, the fact of the matter is, you can't learn everything about us, and you won't learn everything about us, from reading records. Most of us Raider bred Riders...we've got tempers. It takes a few days for us to cool down from them and taking the wrong step while we're cooling down just flares us up again. But we're all completely capable of taking care of ourselves. We weren't raised with the easiest lifestyle after all. You've got a greenrider who originally Impressed to a gold rider, a blue who used to ride bronze. There's a twice dragonless woman here. Our senior queen was just killed when our two junior queens rose at the same time." She stopped briefly and took a breath before continuing.
"One rider has always, and will probably always, use a standin when their green rises. Another rider's blue is so much more suspectible to cold than most dragons that they should probably be moved south until this freak cold spout has passed. Almost every single female rider here is a mother, and most of them would miss drills before so much as even consider taking their child to the creche when he or she is unhappy. Not sick unhappy. You've got a goldrider who was partially blinded when her flit attacked her dragon as a hatchling, and that same rider continues to worry about how much she can truly benefit the Weyr when she can't so much as leave her office if her flit decides to leave and go get some food. There's K'dae who, bless his heart, is convinced that his runner Jaxath is his dragon Jaxath who's just been permanently grounded from a training accident. And then there's the rider who has a dragon who's actually been pretty much permanently grounded from a training accident. Then you've got each person's unique personality which can't be accounted for in records.
"The fact is, most of what I just told you, you can probably find somewhere, in some record. Most of our records are only a few turns old. Most were destoryed with our original home. But what you can't find from records is how each of those things affects each person mentally, and those around them. And you'll never find out how each person works, what their unique personality is, if you continue to think all of us who didn't come here with you know and can without question follow all of these silly rules of yours and stand aloof from the rest of us. Yes, you're the Weyrleader, and yes, you've proven yourself more than willing to go into harms way to get a wayward rider. People will see that. But they'll also see that you're keeping that wayward rider's mate locked up for an affliation that he had turns ago that no longer affects the person he is now, instead of merely saying 'don't leave the weyr without telling someone where you're going again' and letting him go about his daily life. Because ultimately, that rider being locked up throws off the balance of his wing, throws off his mate's inner balance because she doesn't know when they'll actually be able to start living together again, and that throws off her wing. When the only crime committed is leaving to go bring someone home and not saying that that's what they're doing, and they end up being heavily guarded for almost a sevenday afterward, and it's obvious that they don't have ties to the ones causing trouble in the first place anymore...." she stopped and shrugged then, knowing that she was about to start repeating herself.
"I'm just saying that before you assume you know everything based on what's in records, you actually start talking to us first. Ask us about us, ask us about eachother. Obviously there's a reason Swift didn't want anyone to know his past. He probably didn't want people to automatically assume he was still acting on behalf of his old clan, even though he's proven time and time to be solely loyal to the weyr. But if Mac continued to trust him after finding out about that, then you should too."
"Yes, I'm still new to the Weyr and I'm still learning about everyone," M'riel replied. He didn't like to admit it when he was wrong, but rule fifty-one seemed to be the order of the day at this very moment. "And I'm already aware most of my Riders have tempers and need some time to cool off. Shards, even *I* have a temper and know when I've gone too far."
He buried his face into his free hand while Seleti continued her impassioned defense. There was so little he knew about these Riders, and yet deep down he knew he had to somehow reach out to every single one under his leadership. Somehow, he had to show them that he wasn't necessarily aloof and "high-and-mighty", as he'd once been accused of being; but rather he simply didn't particularly care for formal functions such as feasts, Gathers, and the like. Yet his obligation as Weyrleader demanded that he do so, if nothing else but for mere formality.
Well, to Between with *that*. There was a time to be formal, but now was the time to be more personal. But while he continued to listen, M'riel realized how fouled up the Weyr was as a whole. A Greenrider originally Impressed as a Goldrider (how that happened, he had no idea); a Bluerider who once was a Bronzerider (again, he had no idea how that happened, or why); a twice-dragonless woman (Faranth only knew how said person could handle the traumatic stress of losing not just one dragon, but two); how two Junior Queens rose at the same time (did he even want to ask?)
One of his Riders always preferred using a stand-in whenever his or her Green rose (M'riel was willing to bet it was one of the female Riders, but didn't know which; but then again he wouldn't be surprised if it was a male Greenrider who opted for the stand-in); a Blue dragon was apt to suffer more from cold (he didn't know which one); almost every single female Rider would prefer to miss drills over taking their child to the creche (family was important to M'riel, as he'd once been a proud parent, so he really couldn't blame the mothers); one Goldrider was partially blind as a result of her flit attacking her dragon as a hatchling and worried about how she could benefit the Weyr (M'riel resolved to have Shayna discuss *that* particular issue with Ardalae); K'dae he had already pegged as someone whom couldn't seem to get over some mental issue regarding his runner as a permanently grounded dragon...
There was an oft-used term they used in the Guards for situations like this. And by the egg, was it *ever*. To put it mildly, it was a shardin' mess.
He finally lifted his face to look at Seleti. She thought that by keeping Swift benched and placed under guard, it was not only affecting him personally, but was also affecting his wing, and that of her own inner balance. She didn't think that just because Swift didn't say anything before leaving to go find her, it was right of M'riel to order him under house arrest in spite of the fact the younger Bronzerider no longer had any ties to his former clan. She also suggested to actually start talking to his Riders instead of merely presuming, and for him to trust Swift just because Mac did so. M'riel wasn't so sure about simply giving his trust to someone just like that, but to call his rules "silly" was a bit over the line in his opinion.
"I don't simply hand out trust, Seleti. And I'm sure you and the others are the same way. Trust is earned and not given. But never call my rules 'silly'. They're in place to cover just about any situation. Ask any of the Riders who came with me from High Reaches. They'll probably tell you that they don't always agree with my rules, but they're aware they're not hard and fast, either. They'll also probably tell you that yes, they do cover just about any situation to give you some idea of what to do, or what to expect. There's about fifty rules or so; it's my job to teach them, it's your job to learn them. Let's take Swift's decision to leave without saying anything to anybody as an example. You say it takes you a full day or longer just to cool off, and had I insisted on coming with him, you would have taken off again."
"The fact remains, Seleti, is I don't think *any* of us could have known those Raiders were on that island. I don't believe in coincidences, but what I *do* know is you went missing after you didn't return. I also know that Swift had an idea of where you had gone to, and all he had to do was to tell someone that he was going to try and find you. He could have also cautioned me about your temper and suggested that I not go with him, which would have led me to tell him that if he failed to come back within twenty-four candlemarks, I'd have organized a search-and-rescue mission to find both him *and* you. But not telling me anything about his past didn't exactly leave me with a whole lot of room to work with. That's why I insist that my Riders *always* let someone know where you're going and how long you anticipate on being gone. That's why there's rule number three. It not only keeps me from jumping to unnecessary conclusions, but it certainly helps keep the migraines at bay."
"And I do plan on getting to know all of you. Once my shoulder heals up a little, I have something in mind to help in that regard. But don't ask me to simply trust Swift just because you ask me to, or just because Mac does. He may have proven his loyalty to the Weyr in the past, but that was while Mac was still the Weyrleader. Swift has to be able to prove to me that I can take him off the bench and put him back into the field. That'll be my call." M'riel looked down at his sling for a moment, thinking. He knew Seleti was going to be disappointed, so he decided to sweeten things a little. "You two can start living together again as weyrmates. But the guards will remain posted outside of your quarters, and there'll be eyes on Seminth and Cheyneth both at all times."
He finally looked at her again. "And please, for the last time Seleti. Don't. Call. Me. Sir. Sometimes my Riders address me as 'boss', but M'riel will do in most cases. I prefer not to use rank unless a discussion has reached official levels."
Seleti could tell that what she was saying still wasn't making difference. At least, though, Swift would get moved back home where he belonged. It was a step in the right direction, though she still didn't believe that a guard was necessary. After all, with Seminth grounded, it wasn't like the bronzerider could exactly go anywhere.
With a sigh, she said, "You know...if you trust someone enough to make them your weyrsecond despite tradition saying someone else should be, then you ought to trust their judgement of someone else. Especially when that person was in charge before you for over five turns and knows every one else under your charge than you ever will for a long time to come. I'm not saying that Swift wasn't partially wrong for taking off like he did, but I was more so, and for the only he did being that, according to you, the punishment seems to far out-weigh the crime. I guarentee anyone you ask will say the same thing."
Sighing once more, she stood from where she had sat earlier and said, "Your apology's been accepted a long time ago. I only wish that I could apologize enough in return. Unless there's something else, I should probably get back to my weyr."
"Just by showing up so you and I have this talk is enough of an apology, but just remember: It's usually easier to ask for forgiveness. But otherwise, my decision on Swift stands for now." There wasn't any need for him to say that he and Shayna would have a private conversation of their own regarding Swift and Seleti; the Weyrwoman was likely to ask how long her weyrmate intended to keep the brash young Bronzerider benched. M'riel rarely set any timetables for keeping anyone on his "Bitran list", as he felt a person's actions and demeanor often determined just how long said individual would remain on his list. If Swift exceeded the Weyrleader's expectations, then it was likely the former Raider would soon find himself back in M'riel's good graces - and back in the air once more.
"As for Mac, he knows I'm not too happy with him for deliberately withholding information about Swift. He's also voiced his disagreement about my benching Swift. Yet Mac still remains my Weyrsecond because I do trust his sense of judgement of others. But that's not why I promoted him. It's his knowledge of Raiding tactics that I have to rely on while the Holders continue to oppose us. It's his experience with leading strike missions, hit-and-fade runs, infiltration, rescue operations, and other clandestine military actions was why I promoted him and named him our SpecOps Commander. I trusted his sense of judgement, his knowledge, and his leadership skills when we came looking for you. I have to continue to trust those same skills of his while we continue conducting these little raids of ours on the Traders' and merchants' caravans on the mainland, and I will. I'm sure he and I will have a chat at some point over some of Benden's finest whisky and talk about everyone who's served under him." M'riel looked at Seleti for a moment, then tried to shoo her away. "Scoot. I'll ask Dienon to have Swift moved back in with you once Eodira or Macira finishes re-dressing this arrow wound."
She turned to leave, at first deciding she wasn't going to say anymore. But she stopped and looked back at him and added, "Mac's had a lot going on too, you know. After all, that queen that was killed? That was his mate's queen. And I hear she's not doing all that great either. Especially with the twins being born early. Just something to keep in mind." And with that she left.
